SlowpokeBlog

It's true: McDonald's was giving away toy Hummers in children's Happy Meals not long ago. Not surprisingly, while doing some Google image searches, I came across a photo of Happy Meal-eating children of elephantine proportions who will likely only fit into a Hummer-sized vehicle when they reach adulthood. So the cross-marketing strategy may well pay off. (The site link to the convex tots is broken, but a cached version comes up in these search results.)

Likely doofus response to this week's cartoon, imagined by the cartoonist: "Oh, come on! Kids love toy trucks. I played with dump trucks and monster trucks as a kid, and I never went out and bought one. Stop being so politically correct and let kids be kids!"

The cartoonist's reply to likely doofus response: I know. I rocked the Tonka too. But times are different now. Much, much different. And if you can't see what's wrong with marketing Hummers to kids while we're staring down the barrel of possibly the biggest crisis humanity has ever faced, then you may as well give away Joe Camel dolls in Happy Meals too. Why, to oppose such a thing would make you politically correct, wouldn't it?

While McDonald's was marketing Hummer toys to boys, girls had the choice of Polly Pocket dolls "with interchangeable accessories and colorful cases that are inspired by PollyWorld, where the coolest amusement park meets the ultimate shopping promenade." Woo! Way to destroy the planet and reinforce those gender roles! (Via McDonalds.com, where the as-yet unannounced Hummer toys were billed as a BIG surprise).

Golden arches parody taken from RonaldMcHummer.com